So Sean and I have decided to wait until the baby is born to find out what he or she will be. I have said this so many times but people are either just ignoring it or don't want to believe it. I don't have a set reason on why we don't want to find out but our biggest thing is this baby was a complete surprise so we are going to leave it just that. Now I have to admit Sean has been going up on down with our decision saying he doesn't know if he can wait that long. I have to remind him on our decision and my thoughts on it and he is right there by my side again. We got to see our baby last Friday and that made this pregnancy real. I'm still not 100% on board and I hate to say that but it's true. I was more than happy to be pregnant with Michael and I love being his mom. It's hard to imagine life with another one, a different one. That's a different story though. So I am slowly getting on board its just taking its time to adjusting to the fact. Maybe once I can see the baby moving? Maybe then it will be "Real"? I am pretty sure I won't be fully on board until I hear this baby cry. I know then my heart will melt all over again and say wow, I did it again, he/she is really mine. I have talked with other moms who have two kids and as guilty as I feel for having negative thoughts & I have found it to be very common with moms. Well I am just starting to ramble so I will leave it as that for now.
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